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Halcyon
Tuesday, 27 June 2017 • 2:05 pm • 0 comments

Hello. It's been a long time since I last wrote something and published it here. I've always wanted to write but my crazily lazy self didn't seem to agree with me. Does that even make any sense? I miss my blog a lot though.

Uhm so I admitted to this Matriculation College in Labuan. I know. An island. Seriously. I was ecstatic When I found out that I got to further my study there since KML is like, one my goals since I was in secondary school. It was like a dream come true to me. Alhamdulillah. One, strike!

The first few weeks were just fine. I'm thankful that atleast my roommates are all kind and nice. However, I got to admit that I missed my family a lot eventhough I didn't show it to anyone. Not even my parents. I didn't cry, but the longingness was there. And is. (this should be the 'huhu' moment isn't it)

Like always, being a (semi)antisocial human being I am, I find it hard to socialize with people. I mean, it's always so easy to talk to people and laugh with them over something. I did that a lot. But it's never easy to engage in a deep relationships with them. Every single person that I've talked to in KML, and every single one of them, I tried to be close to them as a friend. Wait no, close friends actually. Hah. But it seems like everyone has their own cliques and group of friends. Which obviously, I'm not in any of them. I (sometimes) found it hard to talk to people so I just went through the day without talking much to anyone unless I'm required to have a convo with them. It's not like I didn't try, I just felt tired at times. Tired of trying too hard. #unintentionallydeep

I assured myself that sooner or later I'll have my own group of close friends too, that's what I believe in. They said you have to have friends in order to survive in KML. Duh. A girl gotta socialize if she wants to survive. Duh. (2) Afterall one can't always be alone.

Actually, I'm not the kind of girl that whines over being friendless. In fact, I enjoy my own solitude. My own company. But if you spent so much time only with yourself, you'll still feel lonely (and lowkey empty) though wouldn't you. That's how I feel. Even my roommates' phones can't stop ringing and they be like otp(?) every night with their ehems. (gross) while me, struggling to keep my eyes closed and wish for the best on the next day.

But think positive!! I am sure I wouldn't feel this way again in the next few weeks. My next goal is that to make new and lots of friends!! Okay enough about friends I'm starting to feel nauseous at the mention of it. Nxjskjdlplsks

So it's raya! Well more like the third day of eid. But it's never too late to wish a Selamat Hari Raya to my followers right? And My lovely readers. Heheh

I'm grateful though that I got to spend time with my family before I get back to KML and work my ass off to study so hard. I have goals to achieve afterall hmm.  Being here, in my house at KK, laying in front of my precious electric fan, while writing on my blog, is more than what I asked for. So I'm grateful for that.

I'll come back to Labuan on July 2nd though, highkey denying the fact that time is ticking right now. I don't want to go back. For now.

Why is the time so short when you spend it with your love ones, and why is it so long and torturing when you're alone? Way to Knock my brains out with the question.

Anyway! I've prepared myself enough to go through every challenge that I'll face in KML (hopefully). We all have to be mature afterall. Gain experiences and stuffs. That's how one grow. Insyallah Allah will ease everything for those who put effort in everything they do. Insyallah.

Oh god I better stop writing before I'm starting to sound too emo. (I'm not emo guys don't misunderstand pls I'm a very happy person)

Until then, wish the best for me and my safety. And my study. And everything. See you again! #nerdending



PASTFUTURE


welcome to my humble abode! i literally sucks at expressing my emotion, that's why i decided to start a blog, to express everything i am feeling at the moment. i live for my pets and food. x


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