Girl Online

An update

Saturday, 29 July 2017 • 12:06 am • 0 comments

Hello. Has it already been a week? Or weeks? Can't clearly recall the last time I was here writing stuffs. I guess busy-me is clearly the forgetful-me.

But anyway, hi!!! So I'm back (and wildin'!). I'm doing just fine, as always. My health wasn't so well last week, that when we had classes substitution on Saturday, I couldn't go because my fever was so high-

I went to the clinic and ate some pills, I'm back to the (uhm), healthy me(?)
Yep. Atleast my voice doesn't sound so husky like before, it was so awkward to do presentation in front of my classmates with my clearly unclear and (super) husky voice. *screeches* send help.

Actually, I got nothing to talk about. There was nothing interesting happened? To me? So far? BUt I just want to write here, just to fill my before-sleeping-time session. Writing makes me feel sleepy somehow, that's why.

Uh oh talkin' bout sleeping. I've been dreaming about lots of things lately, it wasn't about creepy stuffs though. In fact I can't clearly remember, what I'm sure about is that I don't really like it. I freaking flinched?? In my freaking sleep?? I hope it ends soon. I would love to sleep without any disturbance.

Aight, lids are heavy. Princess of Procrastination is going to bed. Ily all my readers !!! (if there are any)

x 일라

Clouds

Friday, 14 July 2017 • 3:09 pm • 0 comments

As I'm writing this, I'm comfortably resting in my dorm (more like a room but lets just call it dorm, okay? Whatever-)

Sooooo. It has been weeks since my first day in this college I'm currently in. So many things have changed, obviously. From being friendless to friendfull(?). Most likely, yikes. #AqilaJustInventedADamnWord

When I first came here, homesickness was very hard to endure. I didn't cry myself to sleep, but I missed everyone back home that it was hard to sleep at night. Weeks passed, assignments piling. I must say that it somehow helped me from thinking about home too much (like I did most of time).

Being in college is fun. You get to meet lots of people, make tons of friends (if you are a social person OR semi-social person), and most importantly, you get to learn a lot of new things! That's what excites me the most when I first came here. #NotANerd #JustSomeoneWhoAppreciatesKnowledgeAndEducation #LolK

It has been only two(?) or three weeks since we started studying. Study and dying, indeed. Assignments be knocking on your door and once you opened your door, they came to crash you like a tsunami. A very irrelevant metaphor but well, you get mE. yOu gEt mE ? Yep so don't open the door

In fact, I have so many things to do but since I slept late(max 4 am) EVERY night because of so many tolerable causes (study,assignments,binged on watching dramas oops, etc) , I need to do some recharge too. Lol. I'm going to take a nap for now, and obviously, finish as much works that I can finish tonight.

I'm still working my ass off to avoid procrastination. I know I can do this. I'm positive. 😉

Until then, take care!
Ila x

p/s: i now have like 6 friends and some acquitances in the college full of 2500+ people lol it's an achievement okay don't judge
p/s (2): proud(ie) of my self(ie)

Worn

Saturday, 8 July 2017 • 1:38 am • 0 comments

8/7/2017.
Hello. So I'm back again. It's the first week after our one week raya holiday. Its really late here but I dont mind writing here in my blog. I just finished revising and doing some lab reports too anyway.

So! The first week is.. Kinda hectic. Is, why is? Because the week's not yet over. Believe it or not, We have classes substitution tomorrow on SATURDAY. S A T U R D A Y.

Seriously.

All these non-stop works and studies make me kinda a mess. I have so many things to think, in a student point of view ofcourse. Like, how to save budgets 101(food is hella expensive here), how to manage time wisely 101, how to make friends and socialize 101(still working on it), and the list goes on and on.

All these thinkings make me feel so empty inside and I cannot lie, that I really long for my bestfriends back home in LD. I was just thinking that maybe if we go through this together, it wouldn't be so hard, because there's atleast someone who can understand and listen to my problems and concerns.

But how can one grow up with having no time to experience life by himself?

See. I know I'm in the process of growing up right now, things like this make people mature. I still disagree with the cafe's food prices though. ＜（－︿－）＞

Okay anyway. I think I made a progress!! I made some friends in class and now I have my own lecture seatmates. Hoorah! But well yeah, I still miss my bffs all the time though. Especially Shannon and Anne. ︶︿︶ I hope you guys are doing just fine. I miss you fams, xx.

That's all I guess, good night. Got Classes and lectures to attend tomorrow (yay).

Halcyon

Tuesday, 27 June 2017 • 2:05 pm • 0 comments

Hello. It's been a long time since I last wrote something and published it here. I've always wanted to write but my crazily lazy self didn't seem to agree with me. Does that even make any sense? I miss my blog a lot though.

Uhm so I admitted to this Matriculation College in Labuan. I know. An island. Seriously. I was ecstatic When I found out that I got to further my study there since KML is like, one my goals since I was in secondary school. It was like a dream come true to me. Alhamdulillah. One, strike!

The first few weeks were just fine. I'm thankful that atleast my roommates are all kind and nice. However, I got to admit that I missed my family a lot eventhough I didn't show it to anyone. Not even my parents. I didn't cry, but the longingness was there. And is. (this should be the 'huhu' moment isn't it)

Like always, being a (semi)antisocial human being I am, I find it hard to socialize with people. I mean, it's always so easy to talk to people and laugh with them over something. I did that a lot. But it's never easy to engage in a deep relationships with them. Every single person that I've talked to in KML, and every single one of them, I tried to be close to them as a friend. Wait no, close friends actually. Hah. But it seems like everyone has their own cliques and group of friends. Which obviously, I'm not in any of them. I (sometimes) found it hard to talk to people so I just went through the day without talking much to anyone unless I'm required to have a convo with them. It's not like I didn't try, I just felt tired at times. Tired of trying too hard. #unintentionallydeep

I assured myself that sooner or later I'll have my own group of close friends too, that's what I believe in. They said you have to have friends in order to survive in KML. Duh. A girl gotta socialize if she wants to survive. Duh. (2) Afterall one can't always be alone.

Actually, I'm not the kind of girl that whines over being friendless. In fact, I enjoy my own solitude. My own company. But if you spent so much time only with yourself, you'll still feel lonely (and lowkey empty) though wouldn't you. That's how I feel. Even my roommates' phones can't stop ringing and they be like otp(?) every night with their ehems. (gross) while me, struggling to keep my eyes closed and wish for the best on the next day.

But think positive!! I am sure I wouldn't feel this way again in the next few weeks. My next goal is that to make new and lots of friends!! Okay enough about friends I'm starting to feel nauseous at the mention of it. Nxjskjdlplsks

So it's raya! Well more like the third day of eid. But it's never too late to wish a Selamat Hari Raya to my followers right? And My lovely readers. Heheh

I'm grateful though that I got to spend time with my family before I get back to KML and work my ass off to study so hard. I have goals to achieve afterall hmm. Being here, in my house at KK, laying in front of my precious electric fan, while writing on my blog, is more than what I asked for. So I'm grateful for that.

I'll come back to Labuan on July 2nd though, highkey denying the fact that time is ticking right now. I don't want to go back. For now.

Why is the time so short when you spend it with your love ones, and why is it so long and torturing when you're alone? Way to Knock my brains out with the question.

Anyway! I've prepared myself enough to go through every challenge that I'll face in KML (hopefully). We all have to be mature afterall. Gain experiences and stuffs. That's how one grow. Insyallah Allah will ease everything for those who put effort in everything they do. Insyallah.

Oh god I better stop writing before I'm starting to sound too emo. (I'm not emo guys don't misunderstand pls I'm a very happy person)

Until then, wish the best for me and my safety. And my study. And everything. See you again! #nerdending

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